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Wednesday, March 12, 2003

Read this heartbreaking article for proof about how Phantom and His Airballness are screwing up the Wizz's future and crashing the stock prices of French dressing makers everywhere!!!

Let me commentary on the highlights (THAT IS LOWLIGHTS):
Collins often cites forwards Charles Oakley and Bryon Russell as examples of players who maximize their limited playing time.
yeah, B. Russ has really lit it up this year. Yeah, mmmhhhmmm, right. HE has so much electricity he could light up the goddamn town of Potomac. And Oak? Please. That guy has to be dusted off before he enters the game.

Collins also has said that he "loves" Brown and that "nobody wants to see that kid succeed more than me."
If this is the way a Phantom shows love, then give me a gargoyle and a serial killer any day o' the week!!

Brown said yesterday he respects Collins, but he and his coach don't have a good relationship.
Great, phantom. It's just like when you rode a young Grant Hilll in Detroit, so much so that you just got kicked out of the Motor City (well, the pasty suburb of Auburn Hills, but STAY WITH ME PEOPLE). Phantom is a Young Playa killa. He's like Ted Nugent on a bow hunt: HE WILL KILL YOUNG PROMISE!!! AND WALLABYS

Brown also pointed out that Collins is in the unenviable position of trying to get the soon-to-be-retired Michael Jordan, the man who hired him, to the playoffs while trying to groom young players.
MMMMMMMHHHHHHMMMMM!!! Salieri is killing the future!!! He's a worse cancer than 20 packs a day, 16 bottles of Mad Dog and a strange hot dog in your buns!!! STAY WITH ME PEOPLE!!!

Brown said Collins needs to back off, like he did in the early part of the season, when Brown was playing his best basketball.
BACK THE EFF OFF, PHANTOM!!! Go get your damn organ and play some music and chill the eff out, you skullhead opera lover!!!!

Collins admitted then that he micromanaged Brown last season and he needed to ease back and let him grow at his own pace. Now that the playoff race has "everybody more on edge," Brown said Collins's handling of him has reverted to last season's stringent ways. "If this is not micromanaging, I need to look up the [word] again," Brown said. "M.J. told me he was tough on players like Scottie Pippen and Horace Grant. I don't understand the logic if it's not working. He admitted he micromanaged me, so why still do it?"
TELL IT KW.BROWN!!!! I HAD TO LOOK UP MICROMANAGED, TOO!! It showed a picture of Salieri and the Phantom and them whipping a young but supple and beautiful mule. I THINK IT WAS A METAPHOR!!!!!

Brown thinks that with Jordan retiring, he will get another shot to compete for more playing time and be more of the team's focus.
Kw.Brown, we can only hope this is the case. In fact, we hope that the Bald Bastage His Airballness Salieri Wife Cheater just ups and goes to Charlotte and runs that new franchise into the ground for Bob B.E.T. Johnson!!!! MAYBE SALIERI WILL MAKE CHARLOTTE AS BAD AS B.E.T. ON JAZZ! WE CAN ONLY DREAM!!!! That way we'd have Kw.Brown as the center of our Wizz attention, which means that we will have a chance down the road and through the nubile upcoming years as we reach our golden days and showers and soforth that will make me feel moist with pleasure and alive with pride for that which is WASHINGTON BASKETBALL. Kw.Brown, you are our future. Let us pray you are alllowed to be the center of this team, that the Phantom and his boring-ass perimeter ball-moving offense will be fired, and we will dump the ball into your suppleness. PLEASE DUMP YOUR BALL INTO MY SUPPLENESS!!! I love you Kwame. I...love...you.

Dana - 11:28 PM




The Wizznutzz experts commentaries on the 2002-03 season. Updated frequently!!!