Hi, it's Ken, and I'm back to blog! It's my blog! I've been feeling so-so as of late. I don't think the Mothering Hut charges have worn off so much as I've been staying awake for 23 hours a day scouting the war. I'm feeling edgy and more than a little worn out, yet I refuse to sleep too much for fear of possibly missing out on an athletic feat of war (I hear General Tommy Franks is a marvelous shotputter). Dana came to the office yesterday---she's not looking so good, and she was wearing only one shoe, but she says she's feeling a bit better---and she gave me something from her purse that she called "mother's little helper." I assume it's a chemical extension of the Mothering Hut that has so helped me, so I look forward to washing down this little pill tonight with a Jamocha shake. I hope there are no side effects.
I only watched half of the Wizards game last night because they looked so awful even as the war looked so beautiful. So I switched back to FoxNews and reveled in the bright colored lights. But after the game, Mr. Michael Jordan had his usual harsh words for his "mules," but as the AP reported, "Michael Jordan looked his age on his last trip to Phoenix as a player." 14 points on 4 of 12 shooting for MJ and he's calling out his fellow players? Indeed, Darvin, that is the pot calling the kettle black narcicuss. These are strong words I'm about to say, but I truly believe them, and you know I never lie; I built my reputation on fairness and honesty and a certain amount of nerdy obessiveness, but I want to say this: Mr. Jordan, this season, and your meddling career with the Wizards, cannot end too soon. The day the Wizards miss the playoffs, Mr. Team Assembler Jordan, please call Robert Johnson at B.E.T. to get your career in Charlotte rolling.
Here's Dr. Jack Ramsay's prescription to fix the Wizards. Dr. Jack is very old, almost as elderly as Michael Jordan, and he tends to use words like "apothecary" and "bleeding with leeches" far too often to be a modern medical doctor, but I would pay good money to see a leech go to work on Jahidi White's midsection.
Thanks everyone! Watch the war and e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org let me know if you think you see any late rounders lurking in the desert!
Ken - 9:42 AM